Careless, Careful, and Caring
Care is a word we use every day—but have we taken for granted what it really means? Why it matters?
We have healthcare systems, caregivers, caretakers. We care for each other. Sometimes, we don’t care. But care isn’t just a word—it’s an action, a choice, and a powerful force that shapes how we relate to one another. It’s a quiet yet essential foundation for strong relationships and healthy communities.
If we want better workplaces, stronger towns, and a more connected country, we need to recommit to caring as a core principle—not just in the big, visible ways, but in the small, daily moments where relationships are built or broken.
One example I often use is the simple act of garbage collection. Every week, across every neighbourhood in a region, municipal employees drive trucks to pick up household waste. On the surface, this is a transaction: residents pay taxes, the municipality agrees to collect waste, and the task gets done. The employee shows up on the scheduled day, hauls away the trash, and fulfills the basic promise of the service.
That’s the transactional level of trust: the job needed doing and now the job is done. But what happens next matters just as much—if not more. How the garbage collector treats the empty bins before driving off can tell you everything about how care shows up in a system.
Sometimes, the bins are returned to where they were placed, standing upright, tucked safely out of the way. That’s an act of being careful. The job is done properly and respectfully. Trust is maintained. Nothing extra is required, but it’s done well.
Other times, the bins are tossed aside—left on their side, in the middle of the sidewalk or even the road. That’s carelessness. It might seem minor, but over time, these small slights erode public trust. It signals a lack of respect. It causes inconvenience. It can even pose danger to pedestrians or drivers. Carelessness makes people feel unseen and undervalued.
And then, once in a while, the bins are not just returned upright—they’re placed neatly out of the way, in the safest possible spot. That’s more than being careful. That’s caring. It communicates a mindset: I see you. I respect your space. I have respect for myself and my work. I’ve done my job and taken an extra second to make sure you’re not cleaning up after me. You matter. I matter. How I do my work matters.
These tiny choices, repeated daily across homes and across systems, shape how people feel about their community and their public institutions. It’s a microtransaction of trust. One that, when done right, builds a kind of social savings—an emotional reserve that makes people more likely to trust, more willing to engage, and more resilient when challenges arise.
This is the same kind of trust we rely on in workplaces. It’s the tone set by leaders in how they communicate, the way colleagues treat each other in moments of pressure, the attitude behind an email or a meeting request. Every interaction is an opportunity to show care, be careful, or act carelessly. Each of those actions either deposits into or withdraws from the account of relational trust.
And if we go back to the employee collecting the trash—their relationship with their employer matters too. If they feel seen, valued, and supported, it greatly increases the likelihood that they’ll act in careful and caring ways. Care flows through systems. It’s shaped by the conditions we create for one another.
Carelessness, over time, doesn’t just irritate people—it destabilizes systems. It introduces risk. It wastes time and energy cleaning up after avoidable mistakes. It eats away at morale. It creates disengagement. It’s like a toxin building up in a pool—eventually reaching levels that are harmful to everyone, even if no one notices right away. We’re all marinating in it every day.
Being careful is the baseline of good service and good leadership. It preserves trust and ensures systems work. But it’s caring that transforms the culture. Caring actions, however small, communicate value. They say: you matter. This work matters. Our relationship matters.
This thinking scales all the way up to the largest organizations—and all the way down to how we talk to ourselves.
In that way, care becomes a form of infrastructure—not just emotional or cultural, but functional. A caring workplace runs more smoothly. A caring community is safer, more vibrant, more united. And just like physical infrastructure, when we invest in care, we get a return: trust, engagement, safety, and resilience.
So the next time you're at work, or walking down your street, or interacting with someone in your community, notice the tiny interactions happening all around you. Each one is an opportunity to create a better place to be. Ask yourself—am I being caring, careful, or careless?
Each choice has a consequence. Each one shapes the future we’re building, together.
Want to go deeper? My point of view has been developing over my entire life, and I have been influenced greatly by a number of bodies of research in several fields. Maybe the humanities still have something to offer us - wink wink:
Psychology - Relational Trust (Bryk & Schneider)
Sociology - Social Capital Theory (Putnam, Bourdieu, Coleman)
Sociology - Symbolic Interactionism (Blumer)
Micro-affirmations & Micro-aggressions (Mary Rowe)
Behavioral Economics and Nudge Theory (Thaler & Sunstein)
Social Exchange Theory (Homans, Blau)